Wednesday, December 29, 2010

year end

This year is quickly coming to an end.

Truthfully, I'm not as excited about the new year as usual...2010 was pretty good to me, and I'm reluctant to let it end so soon.  I know 2011 will be as fabulous as I want it to be....but there are so many changes happening in life right now, and it's scarrrrry...

For starters, I'll be 29 in two months.  I know 29 is not old, but it really seems like just yesterday I was 23.  Actually, just yesterday, I broke out a sorority t-shirt from 2001 - it was still in great shape to be almost 10 years old. 

My girlfriends are having babies.  The babies are coming - two bambinos from my core group of girlfriends due in 2011!  Don't get me wrong, I'm so happy for them, and babies will be so exciting - but it's scary to think that we've reached that point in our lives.  The husband and I have had the discussion and it's not for us me quite yet, but we're I'm getting there.

My job is about to get rowdy.  I forget that I started during the holidays, and it was busy then...I'm taking advantage of this week's downtime.  My job will be on crack starting January 4th, and I'm scared.

So, with the rolling in of a new year, I'm feeling the urge to make some plans and changes, but as always, hesitant to share because I always fail to follow through...I thought I'd start 2011 with plans that should be pretty easy to stick to...

1.  Take more trips - long weekends, beach trips, road trips - I'm not discriminating. 

2.  Focus on decorating our house.  We need a new couch, new dining table and complete kitchen redo...I'll be putting less focus on my closet this year.

3.  Be healthier - and take advantage of my swanky new gym in. my. building.  There's no excuse!

4.  Get a handle on my job and learn where else I can fit in in my new organization - all a part of building my own professional network! 

I'm sure a few more will sneak on to this list, but I'm happy with keeping it simple...so, in case a post doesn't happen before 2011, Happy New Year, dear readers. 

Friday, December 24, 2010

is this thing on?

I've discussed the way me and the husband argue. 

We argue over things that are so infuriatingly stupid that I swear we get angrier than those who fight about things that actually matter because what we're fighting about is just so stupid.

I bought the husband a Big Green Egg for Christmas (cue Best Wife Ever cheer & applause).  He's so happy, he's glowing, and it truly makes my heart happy to make him so happy - giving is so much more fun than receiving - especially when you buy yourself little gifts while shopping for others. 

Little did I know that I was creating a bit of a monster....(actually, I take that back...anyone could see that he was becoming obsessed). 

I digress...

The husband is the cook at our house.  I always say he wasn't being properly fed by me, so he had to improvise.  He comes by it honestly - domesticity runs in his family.  Turns out, we're the perfect match because it doesn't run in mine.  So, I purchased him a cookbook called Southern Plate.  He picked it out when we were in Florida, and I stumbled across it at Sam's.  Since the arrival of the cookbook, we've been eating good.  He makes this fried chicken with "come back sauce."  The chicken is breaded in saltine crackers and fried like normal - they say the saltines make it less fatty (or maybe he just told me that).  Either way, he's created a monster in me by cooking that meal.  A Fried Chicken Monster.  I pretty much crave the chicken and the "come back sauce" weekly. 

I specifically bought a giant pack of chicken tenders for him to fry up.  Yesterday, while I was working from home, the craving hit like a ton of bricks.  It's cold outside - give me something fatty and yummy to eat for dinner.  My spare tire isn't quite big enough yet.  When he came home, we had this exchange...

me: 
I'm thawing this big pack of chicken tenders and thought maybe you could fry up that chicken and we can make some "come back sauce."

husband:
 [sleepily]  yaaaaaaaaaaa-unghhhh

The noise that came out of him while I suggested we have the fried chicken so closely resembled a "yes" that I thought we were clear on the fact that I. Want. Fried. Chicken. For. Dinner. Damnit.

So, I left him to rest.  I gave him strict instructions to call me if my work computer started making the incoming email noise often enough to require my return.  So, he calls me when I'm leaving Target.  All of my Christmas Spirit has been stolen by the shitty cart I'm pushing and the masses of slow ass people wandering through Target, clearly just beginning their Christmas shopping.  Phone conversation plays out as follows:

me:
 yup?

husband
you told me to call you if your computer started acting crazy.  Smoke was coming out of the sides, so I threw it in the bathtub to cool it off.

me
oh - very funny.  chuckle chuckle
(sneer - my chicken better be in the fryer)

husband
 so, what do you want for dinner?

me:
  oh, well, I was thinking we could make the fried chicken...unless you'd rather go grab something.
(the only thing that will make this okay is if he suggests Mexican)

husband
oh, well, I was thinking of cooking them on the egg.  I've already started marinating them.

me
oh?

husband
is that not okay?

me
um.....well, I mean......no, it's fine.
(okay, I'm secretly angry)

husband
okay, when will you be home? 

me
I don't know.  I'm out in this shit, and I still need to go to Kroger

I was seething from anger about the fact that he MARINATED the chicken tenders I purchased SPECIFICALLY for my favorite fried chicken.  If he didn't want to make the chicken, he should have made a noise that resembled more of a "no" than a "yes."  Not cool.

I drive to the grocery store - PISSED - so I send a BBM....

me
if you don't mind, don't cook all of the tenders.  I purchased it specifically for the fried chicken because it's delicious leftover
(in my mind - grilled chicken gets hard and gross the next day and THAT'S why I don't eat leftovers)

husband
 Well, I've already marinated all of it.  Apparently I've really effed up - you clearly wanted the fried chicken.

me
Well, yeah.  We agreed on it.

husband
when did we agree on it?  You said last week that you wished I wouldn't cook it so much because of the calories!

Here's where his "selective hearing" kicks in. 

First of all, when I said he needed to lay off cooking the fried chicken tenders, I was stuffing one in my mouth while simultaneously dipping the next one in "come back sauce."  Lay off cooking the chicken means "only cook the chicken when I request it."  Duh.  It also means "awww...sweetheart, you shouldn't have, but I'm so glad you did...nom nom nom nom nommmmm." 

Also, he AGREED that family time over preparing "come back sauce" sounded great...that's what "yaaaaaaaaaaa-unghhhh" means. 

So, we proceeded to send snippy BBMs back and forth until my Blackberry died - which pissed him off even more because, turns out, he thought I turned my phone off.

I came home to this grilled-ass chicken, and yeah, it was good.  I had it over a SALAD since I was so rudely reminded of my caloric intake. 

And we proceeded to not speak to each other for the majority of the evening.  I mean, things are good now.  It's Christmas Eve!  But seriously?  I think someone here learned a lesson yesterday...

WHEN THE CRANKY WOMAN SAYS SHE WANTS EFFING FRIED CHICKEN, YOU MAKE EFFING FRIED CHICKEN.  THE EGG WILL ALWAYS BE THERE, YOU MAY NOT AFTER THE WOMAN GOES BATSHIT CRAZY ON YOUR ASS. 

Merry Christmas.

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Megadesk


I'm working from home today and while the emails are slowing down for the holidays, I thought I'd blog.  I didn't so much enjoy blogging on my work computer the other night for fear the email/computer police were reading every word as I wrote - who knows?  I'm paranoid and prefer to blog it out in private so I can edit as I go.  
Today's post is going to be kind of bitch-fest.  No one reads this blog.  I have more followers than I do daily hits, and yeah, I write for myself, but  there's something to be said about a somewhat decent following.  It kind of keeps you going.  So, if I promise to write on a more regular basis, I wonder if some of my loyal readers wouldn't mind pimping me out?  I mean, this is pitiful.  

Did readers who followed me from kindredly enjoy kindredly more?  Should I fire up that site again, or would that be totally cheesy?  Should I start a completely new blog?  Should I hang it up?  Seriously, let's be honest here.  I got caught up on my girl, Slightly Undone this morning, and she always writes the best stuff - I just have a hard time being that candid about something like a hole in my butt - but how funny is that post (if you haven't read it, go - read - now).  

That's all.  I'm getting back to work at my Megadesk.  Think about these options.  Keep Junk or trash it?  


Tuesday, December 21, 2010

two weeks later

Errr....sorry loyal readers.  The 20-something of you who so sweetly check this blog daily have come up with nothing.  Things here have been crazy.  I've visited this site to peruse my blogroll - but that's even rare - and each time, I decide against posting yet another post about how I'm so busy.  Clearly, I'm busy.  I have thought about making an official announcement about how the blog is dunzo, but who am I kidding?  I'll be back....and here I am! 

It's 7pm on the Tuesday before Christmas, and I'm writing this post while simultaneously checking my work email and handling things as they pop up.  Not to say that my old job was juvenile, but my new job is for big girls, and I've been completely consumed with rising to the challenge.

There are a few updates::
  • For starters, Ryan Reynolds and that hooch, Scarjo are OVER.  O.V.E.R.  wooooooooo!!!!  Literally, me and my new work friends were JUST talking about how weird they were as a couple - good looking, no less, but still weird - and BAM!  two days later, they announced their divorce.  New office friends might have thought I put a voodoo curse on their marriage at first, but I think I successfully backed them off that ledge.  P.S. Ryan's been spotted around the town recently filming a movie - IJS.
  • Zac Efron also split with that bratty looking girlfriend of his.  Oh happy day. I'm old enough to be his babysitter, but he's hot.  Can't help it. 
  • Moving off celebrities and on to the goings-on, I'm exhausted, but haven't been happier.  Things with my new job are just now starting to become somewhat second nature.  I don't squeeze the steering wheel until my knuckles turn white the whole way to work anymore.  I'm actually quite happy in my new role, and I'm happy I'm starting to feel more comfortable.  I was worried it would never happen.
  • I'm writing this post on my work laptop, and I just wonder if someone's reading it as I write - don't like this.
  • I think Mia, our chunky dog, is dehydrated from over consumption of chocolate bark.  She ate no less than 30 red velvet cake balls covered in white chocolate today.  At some point, she threw all of it up...all over my house, and now she's drinking water like it's going out of style.  Beagle up for adoption - taking applications now.
  • Isn't it funny how Christmas is so magical when you're little?  I'm working up until Christmas Eve and I'm probably going back to work on Monday.  I almost want to have a kiddo just so I can relive the magic vicariously through it. 
  • I think we're having a New Years Eve party at our house, but I don't know.  Isn't there something super strange about that?  Kind of need to prepare....
  • Remember when I told you I would be going to the gym every day because the big Corporate guys wouldn't let you ride into work whenever you felt like it?  Actually, that's not the case, and I haven't been to the gym even a handful of times.  Pathetic. 
I know there's more to say, but my brain is clouded with what's going on tomorrow and two glasses of wine.  Hopefully two weeks between posts isn't going to be the norm, but I make no promises. 

x's and o's, ya'll! 
Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and Happy New Year, just in case.


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Monday, December 6, 2010

comatose

oh..my...gahhhhhhhhhhh.....!!!

I went out Saturday night with my fabulous girlfriends for Jamie's 30th Birthday.  Jamie's got a bun in the oven, so the non-pregnant girls decided we'd do enough drinking for ourselves...and Jamie...and maybe the bun if the bun came out an 20 year old frat boy. 

We started with dinner...and wine...then after dinner we took our ready-to-party selves to the Virginia Highlands where we proceeded to switch to liquor.  bad bad bad BAD.  I don't know?...ten drinks later?...I was blackout drunk.  I haven't gotten blackout drunk since........I can't remember.  I went through a whole phase in college where all I did was get blackout drunk.  The night would be a big giant black hole of "whatever happens happens, but I won't remember it tomorrow." 

Unfortunately, I didn't realize I was blackout drunk until the next morning when I felt like I'd been run over and then run over again by our minivan taxi cab.  It was just like a scene from The Hangover when Morgan pulled out her camera to a photo of me lying in the fetal position in the front yard of Chrissy's boyfriend's house...followed by one of me crawling toward the camera...all we can conclude is that I wallered around for a while because Morgan had enough wits about her to pull out her camera and snap photos of me. 

Yesterday was pretty much terrible.  Luckily, I made it home in once piece to the husband who was so on the same page with me.  We napped for hours, then lazed around...and low and behold, I woke up this morning still hungover.

Note to self - can't do my job when I'm hungover.  Just can't.
At one point today, crying almost happened...along with vomiting...why does getting older also mean two day hangovers??  This post feels very familiar...

Sunday, December 5, 2010

pulse

For those of you who care, I will post again - one day.  

Currently trying to lazy off this vodka haze and somehow prevent the now unavoidable two day hangover from seeping into my Monday.